The Bet
by PK102
Summary: Lisa bets Hiyori can't read one of her novels, and she's right, hence the reason Hiyori's about to go on the jump of her life. Crack-fic, vizard hilarity. Written as a challenge for someone I don't remember anymore.


**This story was written as part of my one-shot challenge I did ages ago, and I'm putting the story back up here by itself rather than in the collection. I don't remember who initially gave the challenge (sorry, if it was you and you're reading this story again), and I'm pretty sure two of the four items I was supposed to include were bungee jumping and chocolate. I forgot the other two, but whatever. Enjoy the vizard antics :)**

* * *

"C'mon Hiyori, just do it. I won the bet, so you have to," Lisa said to the girl, who gave her the stink eye and growled at her.

~ 2 hours ago ~

"Why are you always reading that junk, anyways," Hiyori asked Lisa, who had her nose buried in some adult book while they were walking. The two girls, as well as Ichigo and Shinji, had just gone shopping for lunch for the Vizards. Ichigo had been dragged along because, since they were training him, he had to help out with the chores. And so while they were out, they had stopped to buy Lisa some more magazines.

"Leave her alone, Hiyori. She's always doing that," Shinji said, trying to avoid the argument that he knew was going to come.

"I'm curious," Lisa replied without looking up.

Hiyori rolled her eyes. It was the same answer every time. "Yeah, but I don't see how you can read that. It's just…wrong," Hiyori said with a slight shudder.

"It's because I'm better than you," Lisa replied. The comment had its desired effect, because now Hiyori was mad.

"What do you mean by that?!" she burst out, startling some of the people walking around them. "Everyone knows I'm stronger than you."

Throughout her rant, Lisa was still calmly reading her por-book. "Oh really? I bet you can't even read one of these without getting a nosebleed," Lisa challenged.

"Bet you I can," Hiyori retorted defiantly, crossing her arms over her chest and sticking out her tongue.

"Uh, Hiyori," Shinji interrupted, "I don't think this is a good idea."

"Oh shut up, Baldy. It's nothing but pictures anyway."

They had now arrived at the warehouse, but instead of going in Lisa stopped at the door, turning to face Hiyori. "Really? Then I guess reading _Curiosity Killed the Cat: Explicit Version 2.0_ shouldn't be too hard for you then, huh," Lisa said.

Both Ichigo and Shinji shouted "No!" at the same time, reaching to stop Lisa from entering. "She can't read that! You'll fry her brain!" Shinji exclaimed.

Lisa smirked before entering. "Be ready in 10," she said as she left to get the dirty magazine.

~ 10 minutes later ~

Hiyori and Lisa sat at a table facing each other, with Shinji and Ichigo on the sides watching with worried expressions. There was a thick volume in front of Lisa, who slid it to Hiyori. Hiyori took a look at the cover and gulped.

"All you have to do is read it, cover to cover, without getting a nosebleed," Lisa said with a smug grin. Hiyori nodded. "If you can, I'll announce to the entire world that you're stronger than me and treat you as queen for a week. But if you can't, you have to do whatever I say."

~ present time ~

"Now go," Lisa said, almost pushing Hiyori off the platform they were on.

"Shut up. I'm just gonna do one last check before I jump," Hiyori said, nervously fiddling with her gear.

"It's fine, Hiyori. It was designed by me, of course, so it's absolutely perfect. In fact, this entire structure was built by me," Kisuke said, gesturing to the gigantic platform they were currently standing atop of. It was about two hundred feet tall, yet it still didn't touch the ceiling of the underground training room. There were two pillars supporting the bridge all five of them were standing on. There was a rope – a really, really, really long rope coiled on top, and on the other end was a nervous Hiyori. She was standing on the edge, nervously glancing at the ground _far_ below.

"Just go on and get it over with," Ichigo said, bored. He didn't want to stand there all day when he could be training. "We'll give you some chocolate when it's over. Sound good?" he offered.

She only had time to barely nod her head before Ichigo pushed her off the ledge. She screamed most of the way down, and whatever wasn't screaming was cursing. "Aaaaaaaaaaaaah, I'm going to get you, Ichigo. You're soooooo dead," she shouted.

Soon they heard the distinctive 'boing' of the rope reaching its limit and bouncing back. Ichigo and Shinji shared a look before rushing off to the side, trying to reach the elevator back down. Sparing a look over his shoulder, Shinji gave a yelp when he saw Hiyori was back on the platform. Quickly he pushed Ichigo into the elevator and pressed the down button.

The two boy stood in the elevator, panting slightly while listening to Kelly Clarkson's "Dark Side." "So, what do we do now?" Ichigo asked.

Grimly Shinji unsheathed his zanpakutō. "Just think of this as part of your training. Survive in one piece," he said. Ichigo nodded and drew Zangetsu. Soon the elevator reached ground level and the doors slowly opened. Both boys jumped out, back to back, prepared to fight Hiyori but she was nowhere to be seen. Confused, they loosened up for a bit, looking around to see if she was hiding.

~ Hiyori ~

She reached the elevator doors just as they were closing. Cursing, she rushed to the other end of the platform where a second elevator was located. She growled in annoyance as the elevator slowly descended, playing Justin Bieber's "Baby." It was almost enough to drive her insane; by the time the elevator hit the ground she was thoroughly annoyed, her Hollow mask already manifested and ready on the side of her head.

~ Ichigo & Shinji ~

They were still standing there, reveling in the fact they'd lost her, until they heard the ding of the second elevator. Turning around, they faced a very angry Hiyori, and were startled to find her mask on. Ichigo held up his hands to ward her off. "Now Hiyori, I was just trying to help you," Ichigo said, feebly attempting an excuse.

In response Hiyori drew her zanpakutō. Ichigo barely had any time to get ready as she attacked mercilessly. She had already drawn her mask, and Ichigo, without his, went down quickly in a heap of conveniently placed rocks. Finding her first victim down, Hiyori turned her attention to Shinji, who still stood nearby watching. Because he wasn't prepared, Hiyori's barrage almost overpowered him. But him being stronger than Ichigo at the moment helped.

"Why are you attacking me?" Shinji yelled during a pause in her attacks.

Her attacks halted for a moment as she regarded him with predatory eyes. "I'm gonna murder all of you!" she shouted, energy pouring off of her. Shinji gulped as he prepared to attack.

~ several minutes and opponents later ~

Lisa exited the elevator on ground level and was met with a curious sight. Ichigo was lying face down in a pile of rocks and Shinji was lying unconscious in a crater, both looking thoroughly roughed-up. And then there was Kisuke, off to the side, a large red mark on the side of his face, along with a black eye and bloody nose. Renji was there, unconscious with his arm bent back at a funny angle. Rukia was standing around him, angrily fussing over his arm. Yumichika and Ikkaku were there, although Yumichika was attempting to hide behind Ikkaku, who was leaning against a rock for support, numerous wounds bleeding out all over his body. Orihime was attending to Ichigo, with his friends Chad and Ūryū were standing guard, both with bruises and small cuts on them. It seemed the only one uninjured was Tessai, who stood protecting a cowering Ururu and Jinta, though his glasses were broken. Hiyori herself was standing in the center of it all, huffing from exertion.

"What the hell happened here?" she asked, causing Hiyori to turn around. Before she could do anything though, a dark figure jumped down from the trapdoor.

"I've called for backup; they're sending someone over immediately," Yoruichi reported before shunpoing away as a cero came her way. Yoruichi didn't reappear again, probably going to alert the rest of the Vizard or find someone else who could help them.

Lisa shrugged it off, instead walking towards Hiyori, despite the numerous shouts not to. Hiyori regarded her with watchful eyes as Lisa pulled something out of her bag. "Here's your chocolate," she said, holding it out to Hiyori. The Hollow mask on her face dissipated as she sheathed her zanpakutō. Hiyori took it hungrily, tearing open the package as Lisa walked back to the warehouse.

~ extra ~

Senkaimon doors appeared in the underground training room, and stepping out of it was Kenpachi Zaraki and Yachiru Kusajishi. They looked around, taking in all of the injured/unconscious shinigami scattered about. Suddenly Yachiru jumped off of Kenpachi's back, leaping towards the single figure still standing, stuffing her face full of chocolate. Hiyori stopped long enough to glare at the lieutenant. "Back off, it's mine," she growled out.

Yachiru made no move to back away. "Chocolate," she said, reaching for a piece. Hiyori slapped her hand away and she quickly retracted it, giving Hiyori a confused look. "I want chocolate," she said again.

"No. It's mine!" Hiyori said, trying to back up, but there was something blocking her way.

Kenpachi stood behind her, grinning evilly. "Yachiru wants some chocolate. You'd better give it to her," he threatened, hoisting his zanpakutō on his shoulder.

Hiyori gulped but stood her ground. "N-no," she muttered.

Immediately Kenpachi attacked, forcing her to move away with a yelp. He continued his relentless attacks, determined to get the chocolate. Moments later Hiyori was face down on the ground, twitching, while Yachiru was sitting on a rock, munching on some chocolate.


End file.
